I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy