i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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