He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize