And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
