Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
