Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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