Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
