She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize