Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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