We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
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I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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