he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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