aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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