Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize