we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
She even gives head with a lisp.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize