I'm passing your future prison.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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