im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize