I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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