jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
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Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
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Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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