dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
