Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
