Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand Curling. That high.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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