she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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