please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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