this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
