idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
there is puke in my bra ... again
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