at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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