Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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