I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
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I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
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the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
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