Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
She said her name was "party"
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
