question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
