Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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