I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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