First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Is it because I queefed?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
