The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize