Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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