just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
