i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Randomize
