dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
