Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
