well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize