Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
