dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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