That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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