I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
