Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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