Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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