Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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