I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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