walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
