she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
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I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
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you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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