Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
